Sunday, October 9, 2011

Dating: Can You be Too Picky? And Some Things to Avoid

Is there actually such a thing as being too picky when it comes to finding a mate?
No, there absolutely is not. This peson is meant to be your soul mate, your one and only. You want to be picky! Settling for someone that is less than what you deserve is the worst thing you can do.
You need to take your time and not rush things. Go out on dates, and get to know many different people. Figure out what you like and don't like. Make a list of qualities that are necessary, another of things that you can't stand, a third of what you'd like, and a fourth you'd rather they not have. If your necessity list is bigger than your likes you're in trouble and need to rethink some things. Not necessarily during the date, but definitely after go through your lists and see how that person matches up.
If someone doesn't fit at least ninety percent of your likes and necessities they're probably not right for you. If less than fifty percent definitely not. But just because they don't fit your mate ideal doesn't mean write them off completely. Some of them could end up being your best friends in life.
You may not find your mate, but great friends are always great. If you're really lucky you'll end up with both.

Some things to look out for and avoid whilst dating:
Cheaters! Always be sure you're not helping someone cheat. You don't want to be that person. And if they'll leave someone for you, they're all too likely to leave you for someone else.
People needing rescue. If you help them as a friend, and everything gets fixed then there may be possibilities. But if you get involved when they're still in trouble, then they very likely might leave you once they don't need to be rescued any longer.
Liars. If they'll lie to begin with then they'll never stop.
Jealousy. If they don't want you even spending time with friends when you're dating they'll become even more controlling later on. Beware and get out.
Abusers. Whether its emotional, verbal, or physical never put up with it. Don't even start with someone who is. Walk away if you already are.
And never be with someone just because its easy or to avoid being single. Never know what you could miss whilst you're just settling into a false comfort zone.